“Zipper of Questionable Expertise” (Heavy Blend)
Cold outside. Engine light on. Life happening all at once.
Good thing you’re wrapped in the official uniform of people who look like they know what they’re doing.
This hoodie features our logo and the infamous “Talk to us about your car problems” hotline sticker design - complete with a proudly fake number - transforming you into a magnet for parking lot confessions and late-night mechanical debates you did not schedule.
Perfect for:
-
Delivering deeply unverified advice with alarming confidence
-
Warming your hands while explaining why it’s “probably just a sensor”
-
Looking like part of a support group for financially irresponsible car enthusiasts
Warning: May attract strangers who begin sentences with
“Hey man, quick question…”
(It will not be quick.)
You’re not here to fix cars.
You’re here to understand the struggle.
Stay warm. Stay unqualified. Stay Cult.
More details
- 80% cotton, 20% recycled polyester fleece
- Heavyweight fabric (11.8 oz)
- Oversized fit
- Inset sleeves
- Dropped shoulders
- Pre-shrunk to minimise shrinkage
- 2-way YKK zip
- 2x2 ribbing on cuffs and hem
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: Secret Touge Cult
- Email: contact@support.secret-touge-cult.com
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the fire safety requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
“Zipper of Questionable Expertise” (Heavy Blend) Size Guide
| Size label | Width | Length |
|---|---|---|
|
S
|
23 1/2
|
28
|
|
M
|
24.75
|
29
|
|
L
|
26
|
30
|
|
XL
|
27.25
|
31
|
|
2XL
|
28.25
|
32
|
|
3XL
|
29 1/2
|
32.75
|